Lilith brings very powerful themes to be taken into consideration when it comes to our relationships. Lilith is commonly underrated, not very often used tool in synastry or in natal chart. When astrologer do a reading for you, Lilith is avoided. Why is that? What is Lilith and what represents in our natal chart and in synastry?
There is actually few Liliths that are publicly known, but for our purposes, we will work with Lilith as pictured here.
Lilith has quite a bad reputation in synastry and for a good reason. It is that bitch in all of us. If you have hard Lilith contacts in your bith chart, then Lilith themes are very personal to you – wether you admit it or not. Lilith is known to be a wild card of horoscope. Lilith represents our need for independence, it is that part of us that is bold enough to stay truth to herself – no matter what consequences might be. People have their opinions on us, how we should live our life, what is best for us. It is really Lilith, who is ready to rebel against all odds. Free in its expressions, sexual longings, mentally, spiritually… This is that Black Moon in all of us.
Sometimes I am asked where does obsession come from in synastry? Where it is at, how we can see if this will even be a case for us. My answers are usually two:
Obsession comes from hard Pluto contacts in synastry. If you have Pluto square/opposition/conjunction Sun, Moon, Venus, Mercury or Mars, then personal planet person very naturally becomes obsessed over the other. But there is more to this story. People who find themselves struggling in a relationships that are over the edge, have hard Lilith contacts in synastry as well. These two factors go hand in hand. Lilith square/opposition/conjunction to Venus, Mars, Moon, Sun and Mercury can shaken your whole life and break it to the pieces!
Hard Lilith contacts in synastry are the reasons why people go crazy over the other, doing unpredictable, insane behavior they didn´t believe is an option for them. This is true obsession, blackmailing, stalking, sexual transmitted diseases, risking your life and threaten your partner if they want to leave you. Be careful with these aspects, you will not recognize yourself in a relationship.
It is personal planet person who feels the effect. Lilith person is much more unaware about the energy he is presenting. More personal planets involved, bigger trouble I would say. These contacts are so alluring, seductive that one can not pretty much help himself but to act like a wild animal. Lilith is greedy and does not know when to stop. Lilith cannot be satisfied in a relationship. It is like feeding black hole and wondering where it all goes.
But let´s face it. It is not Lilith who brings troubles in a first place. It is really personal planet person and his reactions to Lilith. Indeed, there are triggers that goes deep beyond anything you can imagine, but you still have opportunity to choose and not to act on it. Lilith themes relationships are prone to „happen“ to someone who already has Lilith problems in a birth chart. If you have Lilith hard contacts in your birth chart, you somehow attract partners with whom you can work out these issues, or if you choose not to – Lilith can damage you. I believe we have to be careful with Lilith contacts in synastry and observe it very well before we jump into the big trouble in our life.